Shaping Your World Through Change: Integration

I'm so grateful to share my experiences in Portugal with family and friends, but this week, I took a day to reflect on what it took to get here. If I were to look back to when I wrote out the vision I saw for my life, the official start date would have been seven years ago. Seven years of uncovering, untangling, letting go of harmful and self-limiting beliefs, and time spent studying and appreciating who I am and what I give to the world. I remember the weekends when I was working my 9-5 job, and I was so depressed at some points that I would get home from work on Friday and spend the majority of my weekend sleeping. I had to push myself out of bed to do yard work.

Lately, I've been thrust into this algorithm on social media that features gurus and woo-woo coaches talking about manifestation. The word manifestation triggers me because it reminds me of some of the religious beliefs I used to have and how some spiritual leaders use the term with promises of money and material possessions that you could have in a short time if you just believe. I just saw an Instagram ad that said if you wore this specific bracelet, you would manifest things two times faster.

Over the last seven years, I've had to do so much mental health work and self-care to be in a place to leave the country that I grew up and thrived in. I think I've learned more about myself in the last seven years than in the 35 years prior. Integrating the many lessons I've learned into my life has been some of the most challenging aspects of this process because I had to see myself differently. The 2nd picture on the cover of this post is at the Praia do Ribeiro do Cavalo (Horse Stream Beach), a secluded beach 23 miles outside of Lisbon. It is a gorgeous beach, but after reading the reviews, I realized that to get down to the beach, I would have to hike down steep cliff to get there. I don't know how people brought small children to the beach because I'm pretty agile and had trouble. Once I got to the beach, I unpacked all of my things and just sat, looking out at the water- a gorgeous shade of blue that you could see through to the bottom, and it hit me. I'm still working on so many things that I want to roll out, and I'm so fortunate to be able to take a day off and recharge. It's the life I had to create to be sane. It's part of the life I visualized seven years ago. It was a surreal moment. I was happy with myself for not breaking an ankle and making it down the cliff, and I celebrated with all the others who made it down the cliff to enjoy this beautiful, natural work of art.

When I was ready to make changes in my life, I spent every day doing something to work towards it. Some days, it was a small action like having a logo, creating it, and making it the wallpaper for my phone to remind myself about what is coming. Other days were heavy working days. However, if you keep working at it and dedicate yourself to working through challenging times, you will arrive at your desired outcome. It's not up to me to say how long it will take. It may be a day, week, year, or ten years, but you will see the fruits of your labor over time. Take time to pat yourself on the back, reflect, and sit in gratitude for the things that start to show up through your dedication. Be who you want to become starting today, whether making a vision board or emptying your mind by writing your thoughts for the future. Before you know it, your changes will be so integrated that they will be second nature.